I would love to share real-life situations on how red-blue conflicts could appear so you will better understand how these states govern us.
A family situation that illustrates the conflict between the red and blue levels of Spiral Dynamics is a parent-child relationship in which the parent is operating primarily from a blue-level perspective and the child is operating from a red-level perspective.
The POWER of teenagers
Imagine a teenage child who is asserting their independence and pushing back against their parent’s authority. The child is focused on pursuing their own desires, which is characteristic of the red level. The parent, on the other hand, typically focuses on maintaining order and discipline and would love the child to live by the established rules and values. Strictly blue. “Do it this way because I said so”.
This conflict could manifest in a number of ways. Labeling gives it usually away on what level are we operating in a conflict.
- The parent may view the child’s behavior as disrespectful or disobedient, while the child may view the parent’s rules and restrictions as overly rigid or oppressive.
- The parent may try to enforce their authority through punishment or discipline, while the child may resist these efforts and do as they will.
In resolving these types of conflicts both the parent and child need to recognize and appreciate the positive aspects of each other’s perspective. As a parent, you can acknowledge the importance of your child’s need for independence and self-assertion, while your lovely child could try to acknowledge the importance of following rules, and thinking outside of their box.
As a family, you all can benefit from engaging in practices that support the development of higher levels of consciousness, such as empathy, compassion, and open-mindedness.
Playing board games is one the trendiest way to do this. Talking about important moral issues, broadening your kids’ perspective with interesting ideas, and discussing movies are all great start to discussing these topics rather than bringing up why they didn’t do the house choirs again.
By cultivating a greater sense of understanding and acceptance of each other’s perspectives, your family can move beyond the conflict between red and blue and create a more harmonious and supportive family dynamic.